Fireworks & Pirate Ships.: Are You High Right Now? Do You Ever Get Nervous?

Hey party people! I really am terrible at this blogging business. I know everytime I say that but truthfully it amazes me how terrible I am at it. every. single. time.

Okay well things that have been going on in my life, I just got back from Ft Worth Texas. Me and my friend Hannah decided it would be freaking adorable if we surprised our boy toys in texas town. Which it was. Anyways, some things about Texas....now im not saying Oklahoma is superior by any means....which it is.....so that is actually exactly what im saying....anyways, riddle me this why do Texans have to prove their loyalty by getting an outline of Texas tatted somewhere on them? I mean yes, I get it. You love Texas. Good for you! But....I love America, but you arent ever going to see me getting USA tatted on my back. You just wont see it. Now, what I do when I get blackout drunk does not count. Because honestly I could see myself getting an american tatt.... Geez. Back to the topic at hand, I just dont get the texas tatt. When you are born in Texas do you get mind fucked and genuinely believe thats what you have to do when you get of age? Idk. Confuses me. It truly does. Oh and dont even get me started on the driving there....you know how when you are driving in the city or something and a Texas driver cuts you off causing you to cuss and flip them off? Well, I completely understand now. That is their way of surviving. Im telling you, its ride or die in Texas. Literally. So, I now have a deeper appreciation for Texas drivers. I will still flip one off though if ever given the opportunity.

Now, to another topic. Carnivals. Why do we love them so much? The rides? The games? The food? The music? The carnys? Because after taking a step back and observing the carnival scene, its all just a big money guzzling bastard. Before you can debate with me, lets go into deeper thought on this step by step. 1) The rides. Okay you adrenaline junkies. I get that you love the feelings..being scared...yatta yatta yatta. But if you really think about it, it is a traveling carnival ran by ex cons and illegal immigrants. (Yeah, im profiling. Shut up) some people think of this sooner, but me being the quick thinker I am....waited until I was spinning upside down in a sketchy harnessed ride. Yeah. Flying through the air I realize it was a bad idea. But if you think about it, you never hear of carnival accidents. But I am fairly certain they happen every weekend. Those STATs are accurate. Moving on. 2) The Games? I played a game where I paid $5 to get a bucket of ping pong balls to make it into a cup and recieve a goldfish....I dont know if you are aware but Goldfish run about 18 cents a piece. Yeah. Anyways, I end up spending about $10 trying to win a damn fish. Not because I needed a fish, but because the bastard working the booth told me I couldnt. In hindsight, I applaud that chizzling bastard. He knew how to play me. Ipso Facto, I paid $10 for an 18 cent fish. Bargain! 3) The food? Why do we love it so much? We see what it is made in.....buckets and buckets of grease....but we will knock a bitch out if they cut in the line for a corn dog. Amazing. We are idiots.

Rant. Over.

New topic: Blake Griffin

Okay, we all saw/heard/watched his ultimately badass dunk on Perkins.

I am a Thunder Fan.....but damn Blake. That was fancy. And the fact that I think Perkins is a big ass baby didnt hurt either. However, If Blake would have dunked over Ibaka, I wouldve knocked an uh oh oreo nigga out. I love me some Ibaka. Yum.

Okay, back to the focus. I understand that Blake had a badass dunk and yes we should fall at his feet in awe blah blah blah. But If you washington kids dont remember, 2006 State Finals boys highschool basketball when Washington Warriors plays OCS Saints (Blake Griffin)....well at one point in that game, Griffin did that SAME EXACT DUNK on Tanner Roberson....where was ESPN then huh? Where was the slowmo of Blake putting his balls on Tanners face? Eh? Eh? Where?

I also just find joy in knowing that Blake Griffin was in the tiny gym in Washington Oklahoma. That makes my heart happy. At that time, everyone was going crazy over Blakes brother Taylor being at the gym....haha I bet those fools that got Taylors autograph feel straight up retarded now. Taylor who? Yeah. Good one.

Other things going on, I still havent found anyone to taze yet. I have a legit tazer...but nobody to taze. So if you know anyone that could help me out just hit me up.

Alright, now for the good shit. Basketball wives is on.